PRETEND DOCTOR

Have you ever travelled on Vijay Mallaya's ...King Fisher air lines...well if you haven't you should...i had the pleasure once of being pampered on a recent flight to Timbuktu...and no wonder i told my travel agent to book my return flight too on the same airlines.....
As i reached the airport i knew that my agent booked me on the low fare Air Deccan....an air line i detest for its stiff upright seat if not for anything else.....now i am told it has become a full adjunct of the King Fisher.............anyways!!!!!!!!!!!!
As the air Craft began it's steep ascent...from the run way....I could see some trouble brewing in the front row......i was some where near the tail end....having volunteered for a window seat.....no matter how much I fly i cant get over this obsession to sit by a window...the lure of seeing clouds and streaks of natures golden hues of sun and horizon always draw me to the window seat....
Some passenger wasn't feeling well one could see the air hostess giving some extra attention to a passenger in the first seat of the first row....some 20 rows away from me....
There were three pretty young ladies hosting us in the air craft and all of them seemed to have been pressed in to the service of this one man who seemed to have been in a spot of bother....the aircraft by now levelled off.....and seat belt fastening sign was ....off.....lot of clattering metal noise as many a passenger just snapped free the seat belts and made way for the toilets in the front and rear of the aircraft.....I some how prefer to keep the belt on.....i believe always expect the unexpected when in an aircraft....being a man trained for disasters ..looks like disaster awaits at every turn....

The quiver in the young pretty air hostess voice was very evident as she announced.....IS THERE ANY DOCTOR ABOARD...IF SO PLEASE IDENTIFY YOURSELF......ONE OF the PASSENGERS IS UNWELL..........in my years of flying.....it was the first instance of its kind that ever happened....the tension in the aeroplane was quite palpable....the passengers were looking at each other......waiting for this doctor to stand up like it happens in a movie....five minutes passed by and the fact no one stood and walked meant there wasn't any doctor aboard.....by now all the air hostesses were still busy handling the patient...one of them holding an oxygen cylinder..and other visibly up set making repeated calls for the elusive doctor on board.....soon a visibly up set pilot who might have been informed too came from the cockpit and had a look the situation and went back.......it was obvious that there wasn't any doctor on board....a two hour flight...20 minutes gone i was wondering what the hell was happening.......

Years of training on disaster management and crisis management creeps in some amount of confidence in you....and not so surprisingly enough i found myself heading for the front end of the air craft..
he must have a been a man in his late 20s.....sandwiched between the man and body of the air craft was this brave air hostess holding on to a heavy oxygen cylinder in one hand and pressing the mask in place of the patient with another..one more gal was holding his hand....and trying to calm him...I bent down and took his wrist...and took count of his pulse....what was it a thumping 84.....i could sense a look of relief on the young faces around...as i knelt beside this distressed man...........i felt his palms........and his feet they were cold but they weren't sweating profusely ......i just told the air hostess..to take off the oxygen mask....she did so like an obedient nurse does when the doctor tells her.....by now I quite assumed the role of the doctor...and i was surprising myself...at my ability to handle a patient....the mask taken off i started talking to the patient.....he was quite coherent in speech ....a KPO professional he said he was and even explained what KPO was ....and complained of chest pain and sever burning sensation ....what ever it was i knew....he wasn't very serious patient...for common sense told me if he really hard a cardiac arrest ...of a severe kind he should have gone in to a partial coma by now....so kept talking to him....making him breathe..and doing relaxation exercises i learnt few years back to cope up with panic attacks and panic situations...I asked the air hostess if she had any medicines or any anti anxiety drugs in first aid box...she said she had only a digene tablets...i said lets give him that if nothing it will have the placebo effect......i noticed he was responding quite well and started talking more....I asked of his wife and he was recently married ....i knew that talking of his dear ones would always bring one to some kind of relief and expectancy and desire to live more.....after every few minutes he would complain of severe pain in the chest....by now i was quite convinced that it was a case of severe claustrophobia.....or acidity mixed with claustrophobia that had driven this man in to utter panic and set off all symptoms of a cardiac arrest...I kept talking.......and made him talk...giving him all stories...soon this fellow who was struggling for breath minutes back...was smiling....and was willing to guess the age of the air hostess attending him for last hour or so....he guessed that i am a man past his half way mark....but accurately predicted that the pretty lady attending to him was no more than 24......the young air hostess who so far was looking more stressed out than him couldn't help breaking in to peels of giggles...by now i had taken charge of our patient and was quite happy that he was responding to my commands....now i ordered that he is making a pathetic sight of himself...lying on the floor of the aircraft all his shirt buttons strung apart....following ...my commands he buttoned up shoes and socks in place and finally convinced him he should sit in the seat up right....to my surprise...we had consumed almost an hour by now and the plane was getting ready to descend....as we talked more we got the patient to have a hot cup of tea.....and we talked more and soon the wheels touched the tarmac....i just stood up only to realise what attention i drew in the aircraft...all eyes seemed to be glued on me..i just picked up my cabin baggage and walked away..first one to disembark...more than the patient ...the cabin crew seemed more relieved...
As for me i surprised myself that i could assume the role of the doctor......as i waited for my bag at the baggage claim area a fellow passenger came and complimented me..well done doctor he said....i just nodded my head and breezed past...before i got more attention....or ..worse one more patient...enough of pretending to be a doctor .....for two hours..i thought.... AS FOR ME I WAS LUCKY IT TURNED OUT HE WASN'T A REAL CARDIAC PATIENT...ELSE I WOULD NT KNOW WHAT I COULD HAVE DONE........A PRETEND DOCTOR